7 months

Porter turned 7 months last week. Unfortunately, we had a sick household and there wasn't much picture taking going on. But we are all on the mend now. (Hopefully.)

We go to the doctor next week, but I'd say that Porter weighs 11 pounds. He's still a little bitty fella, that's for sure.

He is starting to wear 3-6 month clothes. They swallow him whole, but he needs the length. His build reminds me very much of Ella Beth - long and skinny!

Porter is a fantastic eater. I pray that it continues! I am hopeful that since I am making all of his baby food that he will not have a "texture issue" like his big brother. And his mama. Ahem. Although I pulse his food as much as possible, foods such as peas and green beans still have a good bit of texture to them. His favorite foods are sweet potatoes, pears, and strawberries. He has just this week started eating three meals of baby food, and he is still nursing 6 times a day. His little belly is still giving him a bit of problem, so we are holding out on cereal and grains. However, it is SO HARD because Porter wants to eat everything. He watches every bite I eat and will even try to maneuver my hand to his mouth!

And I would let him eat more, but I don't feel comfortable because he is not sitting up on his own yet. We are working on it, but given the fact that Porter is still the size of an average 2-3 month old, it's just tough. I have had to force myself not to read any more books or do any more "research" online about milestones. Preemies come with their own time table, and as we like to say around here, "Porter will just do things when he does them." It can be hard though because he is not delayed at all when it comes to his mental capabilities. He is ready to sit up and he is ready to feed himself, his tiny body just won't cooperate.

He still moves everywhere! He is learning that he can get to where he wants to be by rolling. Ella Beth did the same thing, and I remember how funny it is to watch! He may be tiny, but he's a determined little fella. :)

Although Porter is still gnawing on everything (yep, still hate that word), there are no teeth yet. Drool? Yes.

Porter's favorite toys are his....FEET!!! It is so funny to watch him play with them. He will chew on his feet, try to catch them as he kicks them all over the place, and if his feet are bare he will even suck on his big toes. :)

Porter's personality has started to come out a bit, and I'm afraid we are going to have a strong willed little boy in the near future. He has no hesitation about letting you know what he's thinking. Goodness help me!!

This is how he falls asleep most of the time. It started out because we used the nose of this little lamb to hold is paci in, but now he puts his arm around it and cuddles. So sweet. :)

Love. Love. LOVE this little fella!

Multitudes on Monday

1376. a baby boy who quickly adjusted to his new crib

1377. making it a family event when we built Porter's crib

1378. working on sitting up with Porter

1379. Ella Beth working so hard to make Porter smile and laugh when he gets fussy

1380. surprise kisses from Landon

1381. Hyland's cough syrup for hacking nighttime coughs

1382. sweet potato pie made from homegrown sweet 'taters

1383. pinto beans and Mexican cornbread on chilly evenings

1384. Porter staying in his PJs all day - making him even cuddlier than ever :)

1385. reading great books late into the night

1386. knowing that I will share a series of books with Ella Beth one day and watch her faith be strengthened by them

1387. warm blankets to sleep under when the weather gets cold

1388. knowing that because Christ lives in me I am able to overcome personal struggles and live free

Colossians 2:6-7, "So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness."

Remembering "me"

Recently someone made a statement that really made me think. She said, "I think it's so stupid for anyone to color her hair." It was probably directed at moi, but that's OK. This person doesn't have children so she can't possibly understand.

Before I had Ella Beth, I didn't color my hair. I was naturally blonde...lighter blonde in the summer and darker blonde in the winter. But blonde. Naturally.

Then I had Ella Beth.

Then Landon.

Then Porter.

And now...well, one look at my toe heads and it's clear where all of my blonde hairs went. To their heads!

After Ella Beth was born, it was easy to get hi-lights every so often. My hair color didn't change that much, but hormones did take my once light blonde hair to a medium blonde. But I was still blonde and I still felt like "me." Then after Landon, those lovely hormones took my hair a couple of shades darker. And, alas, after the hormones ripped their way through my body with Porter my hair is yet another shade or two darker. I am not a blonde anymore.

Hair to a woman is a very personal thing. It defines us in a way. For a long time, I kept trying to get back to who I was before Ella Beth was born. I wanted to remember "me" as I used to be...young, blonde, cute, full of energy.

But one girl and two boys later, and "me" gets lost most days. I gave up running after those light blonde shades a couple of years ago. It was too time consuming and expensive. But in doing so, I also feel like I had to give up a part of who I used to be.

No one tells us gals what motherhood really costs. No one tells us about being pooped on, vomited on, lied to, snarled at. No one tells us how isolating it can be; how loneliness creeps in when babies' schedules need to be kept. How depressing it is to have to cancel plans because discipline requires consequences. Or how time consuming mundane tasks can be. Or how the excitement of the month is running around with the kiddos cleaning the house because we {finally} have company coming over.

Somewhere in all of that, it's hard to remember the "me" I used to be. My strengths haven't changed - I am still highly organized, creative, thoughtful. But there are times when my strengths feel like they are suffocated. Is it really all that exciting to organize the school room, bathroom cabinets, and pantry again? Is it really considered creative to take the kids on a nature walk in the backyard for the third time this month? And how thoughtful was it really to make the kids' beds for them as a surprise while they ate breakfast?

Some days I feel that my strengths used to be so much more. Like "me" used to be so much...better. 

But then Grace softly blows in. Grace is like that most of the time. It doesn't scream at you; doesn't tackle you to the ground. It whispers.

Grace whispers the reminder that "me" is still wrapped in the Love of my Heavenly Father. He remembers "me" even when I don't. He created the "me" back then, just as He's creating the "me" I am still unfolding into.

It's easy to get lost some days; hard to find the "me" I used to be or the "me" I am now. But God sends His reminder that "me" is not lost; not to Him. No matter what color my hair is.

Jeremiah 31:3, "I have loved you with an everlasting love." (emphasis added)

Baseball Celebration

Of the things that I enjoyed about Landon's first baseball season, the one thing that really sticks out to me is how the focus of Landon's team was about having fun. We played a couple of teams that had very "intense" coaches. And while I appreciate the time and effort those coaches obviously put forth, at the end of the season the boys are still only 4 and 5 years old. I am so glad that Landon had fun and now looks forward to playing again in the spring! For me, I simply want my kiddos to have fun and do their best. Let them be little now - while they are little. If they become competitive on their own as they grow, then they will have my support. But for now...it's these sweet moments of my son's 4-year-old year that make my heart smile.

The celebration was low key and at the baseball field. Eleven boys who are 4 and 5 years old don't want anything more than pizza, cupcakes, and a trophy!

Landon and his cousin, Hayden, had the best time playing on the same team. They are the best of buds. :)

Receiving his trophy from Coach.

So proud! And now we have a great way to display the game ball that he won this season.

Of course, I could have kicked myself in the foot for forgetting my camera. Ugh! But I'm thankful my iPhone is handy for moments such as these!

Multitudes on Monday

1363. Lysol disinfectant spray to keep germs from growing and spreading

1364. sweet little baby socks

1365. enjoying a fall festival with my mom, Ella Beth, and Porter while Scott and Landon stayed home to recouperate

1366. blue-bird days in October so that you can see the mountains from miles away

1367. unexpected financial blessings

1368. already talking about and planning our Disney trip next year...it's been two years in the making already!

1369. the kiddos carving pumpkins and enjoying the icky-gooey-mess inside

1370. hearing the kiddos SQUEAL when we finally lit their pumpkins in the evening's darkness

1371. cute outfits that Porter is growing into

1372. sweet brothers playing under a blanket together

1373. bringing toys down from the attic that have been "resting" for a while so that Ella Beth could regain her excitement for them again

1374. shopping early for Christmas gifts

1375. discussing the true meaning of Christmas with the kiddos {in October} to try and fight against the commercialism that has already begun

2 Corinthians 4:15, "the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God."

Failure to Thrive

I took Porter for his well-baby appointment on Monday of this week. To say that the visit didn't go well would be an understatement. At 7 1/2 months Porter weighed in at 11 lbs, 1 oz. He has fallen way off the Preemie Growth Chart, and to say that our pediatrician was concerned would also be an understatement. Thus, Porter was labeled "Failure to Thrive."And on top of that, Porter has prominent ridges on the sides of his skull that are now of concern.

As his Mama, that is simply hard to take. He is a very sweet and happy baby with quite a personality, and to me he's just perfect.

This is Porter's "thing." We call it his pencil, and he will even do it on cue because we all laugh hysterically at him when he does it. He's not shy on being the center of attention. ;)

He has learned to blow raspberries (aka, run his motor), and he crinkles his nose when he does it which I adore.

He L-O-V-E-S his toes!!! Neither one of my other kiddos ever played with their toes much, but Porter's favorite "toys" would be his sweet feet.

 

The whole "failure to thrive" is just throwing me for a loop. It's messing with my head and heart because I pour all of me into my babies. When something is going "wrong" it feels like it's my fault.

We go for ultrasounds and testing at Scottish Rite and then back to the GI specialist in a couple of weeks. I'm trying not to let my mind "go there," but I'm a mama and it's hard not to.

But then I look at these pictures, taken just two days before his appointment, and they give me hope. He's a happy baby. Rotten, too, ahem. But happy. :)

And no matter what the outcomes of our appointments may bring, I trust that God is in control.

Psalm 139:14, "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

Mama said there'd be days like this

Mama said there'd be days like this. There'd be days like this, my mama said. We are now going on day 19.

I guess the old saying is true: "When it rains, it pours." Well, it's been pouring sickness throughout our house, and it's been rough. The more people you have in your family, the longer it takes for sickness to pass through and leave. Thank goodness we aren't the Duggars.

It started with me - laryngitis, sneezing, itchy eyes, and a cough. I really thought I had crazy allergies. And life doesn't stop for a sick mama most of the time, so I kept trucking along. Apparently sharing my germs with those I love the most.

Because a week later, Ella Beth had all of my symptoms. I guess it wasn't allergies after all. But she bounced back quicker than I did, and has felt fine for the last week or so.

But of course, Porter wanted to join the party and has now been stuffy and running a low-grade fever all week.

And then at 2:30 this morning, Landon started throwing up and had a fever of 102. He never could keep any Tylenol or Ibuprofen down, so when we went to the doctor at 9:30 his fever was up to 103.1. :(

Poor Scott is living on edge...but he's hoping that this will do the trick:

Me? I'm hoping that everyone feels well very soon. And that I can get a good night's rest!